Aniston Sets Internet on Fire

The internet essentially exploded today when the latest issue of GQ Magazine was released featuring a buck nearly naked Jennifer Aniston on the cover. Damn, all this attention must really piss Aniston off! She did after all recently tell the USA Today that she finds the public's fascination with her life "ridiculous," and is getting "sick" of all the attention, particularly as it relates to her relationship with former husband Brad Pitt and his new ladyfriend/father-of-his-children Angelina Jolie.

We absolutely understand where Aniston is coming from. I mean, we have friends who literally think they're friends with her, you know, just because they read about her everyday in tabloids. It's absurd. But, listen, if you really think that "seriously, it's enough," and people need to stop following your every move, we've got some advice for you Jenn...






1. In interviews, don't answer questions about your private life.

2. In particular, don't entertain questions about Angelina Jolie or Brad Pitt.

3. Don't pose nude on the cover of a major magazine.

Wait. Scratch that. Absolutely pose nude on the cover of every major magazine you can. Starting with ours! Particularly given how friggin hot you look at the present moment!

But, stop prattling on about Brangelina (ugh) like you do in the new GQ. Listen, Jenn, we love you and you'll likely rank pretty high on our list of Top Cougars of 2008. But all this talk is unbecoming, and if you're serious about being tired of all the attention (which we suspect you're not), it's a little counter-productive. Personally we find all this "bermuda triangle" nonsense about as interesting (and current) as the Shaq-Kobe "feud." But people, particularly women, find that shit endlessly fascinating. So just stop talking about it, already.

But, by all means contact us about posing buck nude!



Pick up a copy of the current issue of GQ Magazine. On newsstands now.