Sophia: Urbancougar of the Month October 2008

Special Note: During the photo shoot, a delivery pizza stopped by and caught Shophia’s attention. As she put it, "Why go to Dens, when I can order them in?"


Sophia grabbed our attention immediately when she wrote to us and announced, “I am a cougar through and through and blessed to be one!” It’s that combination of confidence and pride we love, and it didn’t hurt that she’s a stone fox. Sophia’s a creative soul, designing homes and her own lines of clothing. She’s also begun exploring writing as a creative outlet. “Writing is another passion of mine and a work in progress.” In her free time she enjoys spending time with her friends, hitting cool lounges and checking out live shows. She also in enjoys “long hot baths,” loves yoga, and loves swimming and bodysurfing in the ocean. Funny, we love women who love those things, too. Kismet, it appears.

Sophia tells us she’s “adventurous but not dangerous.” We’re not so sure about that. There are clearly countless young men out there in serious danger of falling for her. And lucky for them she thinks, “falling in love is pretty amazing. Yet it’s somewhat like a rainbow. You have to be in the right place at the right time to see it.”

Sophia opened up with us about her wonderful cougar ways.

What do you think it means to be a cougar?
Being a Cougar is interesting. It is not a choice as I see it; it kind of happens. I get a little older in numbers, yet the way I feel inside is still young and full of life. As time progresses, the older men seem less excited by things in general, other than making money. They seem to carry their past experiences heavily and this just doesn’t work for me! I love action and stability. So being a cougar is about having the freedom to keep my young spirit, mind, and body alive. It means I have choices. I won't live in a box to keep my reputation up for the rest of the world. If I want to wear clothes that a 27 year old wears and I can pull it off, I will! I will date men who are younger if it feels right and we connect.

What do you like specifically about younger men?
I can say that they are much less complicated and are adventurous. There is less judgment and they’re not going to try to change you. They like you for who you are! I find that once they feel close or safe with you they tend to be a lot more attentive in ways I have not felt with an older man. I could say a mouthful here, but I will say from “the bedroom to my heart" there is a lot more they are willing to share. They completely appreciate a real woman. It is not a high maintenance relationship although it needs attention like any relationship. But there’s so much less drama, if they are indeed a mature younger man!

Why do you think they're drawn to you?
Most likely because I preserve myself. Or maybe I have good genes. I believe there are not a lot of games involved, and I think they can feel that right away. A cougar is going to say what's on her mind. Quite simply, it’s a turn on for some younger man to meet a woman rather than a girl. She knows who she is and she carries confidence that makes her even more sexy. I find that the younger men that I have dated have enjoyed this about me. I am sexy and my skin is still soft. I have a wild sense of humor and sometimes they think I have more energy than them! They also love my intelligence and experience. I’m someone they can talk to and actually have a real conversation with.

How does it make you feel when a young man hits on you or falls prey to your seductions?
To be completely honest I have not gone the route of “a younger man falling prey to my seductions," as they are generally the ones to get me to fall prey to their seductions! As I said this is how my life has turned out the last several years and not what I was after. It just happened and I am finally accepting this. If he has what it takes to win my me over, then I have to say I feel pretty awesome when I meet a younger man that has all that going on – smart, sexy, warm, and genuine. If he’s got that I will date that great young guy. And enjoy every moment of it!

Tell us about an experience you've had with a younger man.
One that is most spectacular in my mind is an evening that I went out with friends to a lounge after I had just turned 40. My friend and I went to the bar to order some drinks for our friends. I stood at the bar and there was this guy sitting there having a drink alone. I could not take my eyes off of him. He was beautiful. He seemed rather aloof though, dressed in a stylish black suit and very sophisticated. I asked if he could get the bartender's attention for me. When he did, I heard an accent so I asked, "Where are you from?" He said, "Guess." I said Mexico City and he was shocked. No one ever got it right since he had lived many places and his accent was combo of things including Italian and French overtones. He was impressed with that. We invited him back to our seats, where we all had a really great time. The party continued at one of my friend’s homes. He played the piano and we danced till 5 in the morning. Everyone passed out. When I woke he was asleep next to me in his suit. I had to laugh.

We spent the whole day together at the beach. Never did anything more then a kiss. I had to bring him back that evening and drop him at his car. When he got out he asked for my number and if we could go to dinner sometime. I said, “How old are you?" “Thirty,” he said. I thought he was 35 so this seemed a little young for me! But I gave him my number and avoided him for weeks to come, telling him I believed he was too young. But finally I gave in and 10 months later we were celebrating my 41 ST birthday and, yes, we were still dating. It was the night I discovered through my friend who saw his ID that he was actually 23 years old. I was blown away. Long story short he explained if he would have told me, I never would have given him a chance. He was right! I am happy he hid it at the time. He sort of changed my thinking all together. He moved back to Mexico City, but we are still great friends. He is one of the BEST men I have ever known! Thank you, Mario!

How do you maintain your feline allure?
I started at the age of 3 due to the fact I was the only girl and 4 brothers. I had an ultra-feminine mother who had my nails and toes done at all times. Always pretty dresses and shoes. Ears pierced by six. Moisturizers and cleansers nightly at 8 years old and was always involved in activities such as gymnastics, swimming , dance! Today I do all the things I did then and am loving life!

Have any words of wisdom out there for your fellow cougars out there?
Be true to yourself first whether or not others will Judge you for it. And try not to judge a book by its cover. What lies inside is still a mystery. Remember that age is only a number and the number of years does not equal the amount of experience. It's not “the amount of breathes we take in this lifetime, rather the moment's that take your breath away." Make yourself happy as long as you not making others unhappy along the way. Live the life you dream!





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